OK I have been kicking this idea around with our global mod Hypsi and I think that since most of us(yes I am including myself in this) enjoy a good goof and it had been pointed out by fellow mods and members that it gets in the way of a member getting our opinions or help. So this thread will be for funny story's about fellow members, Jokes you have heard or just regular good old poking fun. Having said this and trying this out lets try and keep all other threads on topic, lets not use this as a chat room either (we are not going to have another girls in the forum mess here). Most important rule follow AF GUIDELINES LISTED HERE-http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbu...guidelines.html (http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/guidelines.html) .

John

this is a good idea, lets see how well it holds...

girls in the forum mess here


best thread ever...

i still dont get the jello jokes, never went back to read what the hell you guys were talkin about...

I am hoping this will work out as good as it did in my head but then again there are so many voice talking in there who can concentrate. BTW I will start the banter off. Geno's breath smells like cat food

thats funny cause my cat's breath smells like cat food too...

i still dont get the jello jokes, never went back to read what the hell you guys were talkin about...
Well you really only have to read one post to get the whole Jello thing. http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=245422&page=4&pp=15

John

Geno's breath smells like cat food

I think there is good reason for that...Hes gonna have to stop that if he ever wants a date since that smell isn't very appealing, and taking them to the local humane society isn't cool either. Now if we could only get him fixed...:eek:

I would be carefull at poking fun of Geno. He has been known to slaughter peoples loved one's with no warning(I'm lucky I only love myself) and I will use any of you as a shield if it comes to that.

John

and Formula's breath smells like used tampons.

Genos Breath Smells Like POOP.

ahhh the memories..... *tear*

precious, arent they?

almost as precious as my cars

cuda's breath smells like chevy_chic.

=O Yer ugly and your face looks like an ape went crazy on it.

LT1 is the coolest Mod EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

TAMAX is the biggest Tool EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kasey Makes The Best Keebler Elf Cookies EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

John is the best rearend servicer ;) EVER!!!!!!

now that just gross...

anybody watch this show on history channel: full throttle?

was it on again and i missed it AGAIN?!?!

its just about over (on the east coast). its not a great show. the garage and race parts are pretty week, but it gives a great history of the cars that are on the show. thats the only reason i watch it...

anybody watch this show on history channel: full throttle?


I hate the "turbo twins" worse public display of incest there has ever been.

I refuse to watch that show after the butcher job on the GN's... they have to be the biggest toolsheds out there. I think chris walker ranks higher than they do

there's a little bit of venom in that post. i cant stand those twins, it doesnt even seem that they know much of anything about cars...

i wholey agree, that gn episode was a mockery. the history stuff is the only saving grace of the show.

what's a history channel?

kindof like the discovery channel on steroids, a channel packed full of documentaries and educational programs. it doesnt rott your brain, teaches you stuff, and actually has good programming on it. in other words: its not MTV

What would the outcome be if i gave Geno a nipple twister?

a pool of blood on your kitchen floor.

well, obviously i havent been around for a while, but i just wanted to say congradulations to Formula for the promotion. glad it happend, and try not to fall to the dark side. ;)

hey guys.. lets all play pig pile on John and pinch his ass.. lol

Thanks 89 and I will try and keep these a$$ monkey's under control.

John

well, obviously i havent been around for a while, but i just wanted to say congradulations to Formula for the promotion. glad it happend, and try not to fall to the dark side. ;)
Johns already been up and elfs ass and back so the dark side you speak of should be nothing......

so what benifits come with your new promotion as Mod john, do you get health isurance, dental care, life time supply of kitty litter some free BJs?

^steak

eww why would he want that i said benifits not artery cloggers, anyway im donating blood tomorrow and they told me to eat something with protein like steak, crazy bastards, im eating a peanutbutter and jelly sandwitch

so what benifits come with your new promotion as Mod john, do you get health isurance, dental care, life time supply of kitty litter some free BJs?
Ridicule and a complete lack of respect from my fellow members among a few of the things.

Ridicule and a complete lack of respect from my fellow members among a few of the things.
what more could you ask for

John, I am you father. Join me and together we can rule the forum as father and son...

Ridicule and a complete lack of respect from my fellow members among a few of the things.


If you insist

You can all kiss my ban stick.:icon16:

John, I am you father. Join me and together we can rule the forum as father and son...Just cause you had that thing with my mom does not mean I am going to call you daddy.

eww why would he want that i said benifits not artery cloggers, anyway im donating blood tomorrow and they told me to eat something with protein like steak, crazy bastards, im eating a peanutbutter and jelly sandwitch


you'd rather eat a PB&J sandwitch instead of a steak????? are you crazy?! lol

i sware u guys make my damn day.... if i need a laugh im sure to get one in here

eww why would he want that i said benifits not artery cloggers, anyway im donating blood tomorrow and they told me to eat something with protein like steak, crazy bastards, im eating a peanutbutter and jelly sandwitch
Damn.... I sure as shit hope I dont get any of your blood...... :nutkick:

damn hippies and their no meat diets...

Good show on Speed channel. They are talking about RS, SS, and Firechickens now, but not sure what it will show later. Thought you might want to turn it on if you didn't have anything better to do(like me). Oh, by the way, its American Muscle Car... "Street Legal" is the name of the episode.
EDIT: sorry, didn't realize how soon it would end! They started getting into the aftermarket a bit and mentioned some of SLP's parts for Camaros. Maybe they'll replay it soon...

speed channel has a really awsome show about old muscle cars, which i forget the name of it. they take old completely restored to show room condition cars and run em through the paces. 1/4, 0-60, slalom, braking, and such and then grade the cars. its pretty interesting to see what the different manufacturer's cars could do against each other back in the day...

Today i had to listen to some kid with a 94 Z28 talk shit to a guy he doesn't even know. One of my teachers last semester and a good friend who has a pretty fast wagon. Douche bag, i need a Jager Bomb or something, i'm bored as fuck, anyone wanna take E shots with me?

Today i had to listen to some kid with a 94 Z28 talk shit to a guy he doesn't even know. One of my teachers last semester and a good friend who has a pretty fast wagon. Douche bag, i need a Jager Bomb or something, i'm bored as fuck, anyone wanna take E shots with me?


E-shots???

sounds like something you would pay extra for at a vegas whore house :eek7: Why are you asking us to do that with you???

To take shots with me?

Ok i'll do them alone.

To take shots with me?

Ok i'll do them alone.

I was just messing with ya man LOL

I would take shots with you any day

And I will do lots of real shots of SoCo & lime and will dance like a monkey on my web cam. If this helps.

oi lt1, haha talkin aussuie aagin[ what can a gy do to get on tha t shit list of yours clkiy

oi lt1, haha talkin aussuie aagin[ what can a gy do to get on tha t shit list of yours clkiyVote against me for being a mod.(JK, get over here and twist Geno's nipples)

update on the blood donation: so they told me i have O+ blood and its good for a lot of people, but i have a very rare type of anti-body, that helps heal quicker and prevents diseases, giving me good health, so i guess not eating steak paid off huh guys, so now they label my blood as "rare" and i can sell it for good cash instead of donating

Well then Geno is going to cost you some cash when he bath's you in your kitchen with it.

John

Geno better back off my blood unless he is hooking me up with a lifetime supply of KFC so whats the deal GENO!?

And I will do lots of real shots of SoCo & lime and will dance like a monkey on my web cam. If this helps.

or you could not be a girl and take the soco straight up

Just cause you had that thing with my mom does not mean I am going to call you daddy.

yeah dude that was a wild ride...jk

or you could not be a girl and take the soco straight up
I know , I know. I have my boobies on lay away cause I am a little girl but it just taste better with lime.

Ok I am prob stupid but what is soco?

Southern Comfort.

oh duh. John do you have gmail? and i thought its past your bed time? lol

I like straight shots of 151

you sir, are a masochist

I love how I have made it into the majority or the camaro forums sigs(very nice Gold BTW) and you wonder why my list of people that suck is so big.

oi lt1, haha talkin aussuie aagin[ what can a gy do to get on tha t shit list of yours clkiy


:disappoin

Sorry

Its ok I took a couple semester's in college of introduction to drunken stooper 101. I can translate for the rest of the forum if you like.

no need, im in 200 level college drunk classes. im fluent in "wasted"

leprechauns tell me to burn things...

Are you sure it wasn't a Elf?.
He has been a bad influence in the past

to tell you the truth he did kindof look like that cookie making elf.. i just assumed he was a leprechaun because he was wearing green.... good catch..

leprechauns tell me to burn things...
Wasn't that in a movie?

EDIT: I remember now, it was the Simpsons video game.

to tell you the truth he did kindof look like that cookie making elf.. i just assumed he was a leprechaun because he was wearing green.... good catch..
if kc was irish he would be a leprechaun but since hes not hes just a cookie making elf....

yup.. ralph wiggum quote from The Simpsons.. he is probably the funniest character on that show.. IMO

Ahhh, yes that was it, crazy-ass Ralph Wiggum. That boy really has problems... :lol:

"it tastes like...burning"

i like when he plays "waggle puppy".. lol.. WTF..

all hard alcohol was made to be taken strait, unless your drink of choice happens to be sky vodka, or fuzzy navels. Wanna kick your own ass, get a four horseman, one shot of each, jack, jim, jose, and the captain, all in a bourbon glass. Goes over great on 21st birthdays, but ill take my strait vodka thank you.

No rum thank you, i have had a 3 Wisemen which is all those minus the Captain. However, 15 shots of Captain Morgan Private Stock almost killed me one night, so that's a big negative on the rum, and i mean any rum, can't even smell it without vomiting. Last night though, it was Jager bombs, for those that dont know, it's Jagermeister and Redbull.

ha.. vodka is for women, so is yag and captain morgan.. anyone ever had a dead rabbit? prarie fires are my shot of choice (can substitute tequilla for 151)


I just watched Napoleon Dynamite.. man, that guy reminds me so much of.. well.. me?!

I've come to the conclusion that i can't handle hard alcohol all to well. I think maybe i should just stick to beer, i can last all night drinking strictly beer. Good ole Killians has never let me down.

ive never had american beer but i hear it tastes like water

Depends on what you get

I prefer battery acid and paint thinner.

i drink drain-o.. clears me right out..

draaaaaaaaaainnn OOOOOOOOOO

or the stuff with the tiny scrubbing bubbles.. "they clean the bowl, so you dont have to"

I love how I have made it into the majority or the camaro forums sigs(very nice Gold BTW) and you wonder why my list of people that suck is so big.
I have been trying to get on your list for ever. Its about time.

damnit! does this mean i have to edit the list for like the 50th time!?!

kieft is a whore

no.. im a SLUT.. i quit charging..

your loss, i'm still charging..... how do you think i bought my pimp mobile?

you robbed a bank? just my guess.. its probably what im gonna do.. but if i rob the bank im gonna get an enzo, so i can win some races in ohio..

you wont win any races in ohio..... enzo or not..... btw if u need help with the bank job give me a ring.... i have a little experience......

i knew it.. i actually will just settle for the Trans Am that i have been fantasizing about for months now.. i just gotta scrounge up enough to buy a helmet.. lol and we're definately racing.. i'll kick your ass.. lol

lol ok HELMET BOY.... wont your mother let you out of the house without your head gear? *does the one handed retard slap on chest........ deeeeerrrrrrr*

i have a walking helmet that i used to wear to the bus stop.. will that work? lol

if its dot rated sure.... did u already put cool sickers on it? because i have some cute lil bunny stickers.... and some letters.... we could make it all neat lookin.....

it has a Seasame Street sticker.. but i think i need more.. maybe Blues Clues or something.. i dunno, i seen you had an awesome Spiderman sticker.. maybe we can trade.. lol

oh! oh! oh! i just found a sponge bob and bob the builder sticker! and i have some cool glue & glitter... we can make it all shiney..... i wish i had a helmet... :(

you better get one if we go to ohio.. i think if you run less than 14 you have to have a helmet.. maybe we can get you a cool bike helmet with like stripes n what not..

oh we can take my sticker letters and spell out marcus on the front of the helmets.... then we can be twins......!!!

lol.. like we already arent.. jeez..

lol im gonna put stickers on my shin guards too.... have you seen any keebler elf stickers around?

Do you mean stickers on your knee pads?

jesus christ you guys are post whores.

nu uh, shin guards aka keebler elf ankle biter guards..... your just jealous korn.... your a wanna be whore...

no.. shin guards.. so KC cant bite him.. and if you send in your proof of purchase on the ELF cookies.. you get a Keebler sticker free..

BANTER THREAD.. its what its here for.. lol

YES!!! maybe KC can hook me up too....

i bet he could.. after all, he offered john some cookies when they hung out and tapped kc's rear end...

i wonder if he got his flapping rear end fixed.....

we may never know...

this not sleeping at night thing is getting kinda rough....... 1 night a week is ok but this is like my 3rd night without sleep.....

Well now you know how i feel. I work at night at cant sleep very good in the day time. It does get old I feel for ya

yeah.. not getting sleep sucks..

what the hell is that??
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/KaotiKKid5/kylebeast.jpg

where did u get my body pic from?!

That is funny. How did you get the pic of me when I was a kid?

lol.. honestly thats my psychotic 4 y/o cousin Kyle.. who might i add is an F-Body lover as well. If you ask him his favorite car he will tell you "Camaro"

i dunno kaotic... but i saw this fly by today... and i thought "wtf"
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v246/cuda_dude/poorjohncopy.jpg

i seen that too.. they must have been making their rounds all over the state

it was flying from the east.... New York direction....

lol.. honestly thats my psychotic 4 y/o cousin Kyle.. who might i add is an F-Body lover as well. If you ask him his favorite car he will tell you "Camaro"
Good job teaching him young.

And for no particular reason:

http://www.vegalleries.com/commopc/49keeb6.jpg
http://www.vegalleries.com/commopc/49keeb4.jpg
http://www.msu.edu/~daggy/cop/images/00000246.gif
http://www.wendellwit.com/images/keebler.jpg
http://www.virulent.nu/images/elf4b.jpg
http://www.trinityofiniquity.com/srs5/bark.jpg
http://stores.safeshopper.com/10/00/13/70/62/images/h15tkvp.gif
http://stores.safeshopper.com/10/00/13/70/62/images/h12qwba.jpg
http://stores.safeshopper.com/10/00/13/70/62/images/61ffttm.jpg
http://www.tvacres.com/images/keebler_lapel.jpg
http://members.aol.com/willadams/portfolio/web/0406058/ernie-lg.gif

The End

Rob

elves=evil is funny

lol nice one rob

My hero
http://img228.exs.cx/img228/2466/enclosurepictureviewerdocument.gif

oh we can take my sticker letters and spell out marcus on the front of the helmets.... then we can be twins......!!!
Oh god!, Now they are even going to start dressing the same and just for the record I am average sized(If I was a hamster that is).

I'm hungry, what sounds good?

Long Island Ice tea.

God no, it has rum in it!!

It has lots of good stuff in it. Have a couple of those and you really will think your superman.

or wonderwoman....

or wonderwoman....
ROFLMAO, thats great. I use to love that show when I was a kid and watched it recently on some crazy digital cable channel at like 3AM in the morning and I must have been one dumb ass kid cause that was corniest show ever and that whole invisible plane thing and twirling to turn into wonder woman it was just too goofy to take seriously.

that shit was real.

Genopsyde and cuda dude get together

http://img96.exs.cx/img96/9747/cudageno4dg.jpg

soon there will be a bunch of little geno_cudas running around shitting everywhere

good call on taking my quote.. lol

^Best post AF has seen in a long time. I have wet myself. thank you. I have urinated on myself and sitting in a puddle of pee and enjoying it. Thank you very very much.

so that's why you have plastic bed sheets.

Hey I can wet my bed all I want but that still doesn't make me a big Marcus lover

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/KaotiKKid5/afguys.jpg

spice up your life... lol

oh man this is not right

its fitting that i made you SCARY SPICE.. lol

ok for anyone who comes in.....which one would you do? :rofl:

someone make a poll.. lol

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v609/ricmeister/kierf.jpg

a little kieft action about to happen

I would not do any of them to damn fugly. YUK I think I am some phenergan for nausa.

you guys are some sick a$$ mofo..lol

you know it.. lol

Dude you did not put a a non of the above.lol

It says sexier not sexy. Were not asking who you would want to date but if your life depended on it who would you never admit to your friends you messed around with first.

How about this, who is the sexier hooters girl

Well if they made you a mod John I guess let go for Pres. too. http://img230.exs.cx/img230/2466/enclosurepictureviewerdocument.th.gif (http://img230.exs.cx/my.php?loc=img230&image=enclosurepictureviewerdocument.gif)

Sweet but Monica isn't my type.

I was hoping it would still have the movement but I suck at this cut and paste stuff

Oh and it does not count if you vote for yourself. That is wrong wanting to do yourself...

my face is white and my body black, yet i still think im the sexiest on there

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v246/cuda_dude/untitled1232321copy.jpg pancho pancho pancho

ok now i dont know what that is... or what its supposed to be but its late and eh f*ck it.......

:lol2: HAHAHAAHHA oh damn thats ugly

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/KaotiKKid5/afguys.jpg

spice up your life... lol


Awww man, why did you have to show that, i just got up and haven't had any caffeine yet!!!

I don't care what the polls say I am the prettiest.

OMG last night was the fucking craziest night I have had in a LONG time.

Well since I got this new Job, A couple of friends and I went to big AL's (World Famous strip club in Peoria, Z28 Josh knows what I am talking about.) Well I walked in and let the 20's and 50's fly like there was no tommrow. OH MY GOD... Strippers get feisty when they smell money. They dragged me on stage and beat the shit out of me with a rivieted leather belt.... Pain has never felt soo good.

Ok, im hung over, I am going to find out how much money I spent and try to recover..

:icon16:

HAHA, That's probably one of the first places i'm hitting up when i turn 21 next year. But singles probably would have gotten the job done, why the hell were you tossing out 20's and 50's!?!?

I feel ashamed though so i can't say much, i lost at beer pong last night...twice.... Played the card games drunk driver and asshole to.

thanks spice girls...i needed a good laugh today!

whats wrong with you guys, we all know IM the sexiest spice girl, so vote for me

It was tough cause they're all ugly, but i went ahead and voted for Cuda, based on coin flip.

I just lost my breakfast, lunch, and i havent even eaten dinner yet but i threw that up as well!!!!!!!!!!!!! John Red is not ur color. Which one is menstral spice????? :banghead:
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/25420969Firebird_5_-med.jpg

Well say what you will about the rest of us but one thing is for sure Geno makes the ugliest woman I have ever seen but I would still marry him.

menstral spice? :confused:

Time for a nap.........

fuckin eh last tiem i was on here this was at page 3... i figures "oh i dont need to read the rest" but as soon as i saw the poll i think i do...

you have a lot of catching up to do

hey look.. our favorite mod buddies.. lol

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/KaotiKKid5/johnandhypsi1copy.jpg

little turbo.. you're the one.. lol

Kasey watch your back. They are after cookie makers http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=573&ncid=757&e=1&u=/nm/20050205/od_nm/odd_cookies_dc .

John

hey look.. our favorite mod buddies.. lol

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/KaotiKKid5/johnandhypsi1copy.jpg

little turbo.. you're the one.. lol

that picture is so beautiful that it brings a tear to my eye...

LMFAO that shit is great

yeah, it was a colaborative effort with cuda.. he's the photoshop king..

This game's quite an offensive struggle isn't it?

well damn, im not even a favorite mod anymore.... sniff sniff i just dont feel as loved when my face isnt plastered on a fuzzy puppet with a hand up its ass :)

well damn, im not even a favorite mod anymore.... sniff sniff i just dont feel as loved when my face isnt plastered on a fuzzy puppet with a hand up its ass :)


Only thing i can think of to say right now for you man...


[QUOTE=JSwigz] You suck at life, you should die [/QOUTE]





:p

well damn, im not even a favorite mod anymore.... sniff sniff i just dont feel as loved when my face isnt plastered on a fuzzy puppet with a hand up its ass :)
Hey if this didn't prove how we feel about you.
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/500/14407589-7.jpg
then Nothing will, now get your girlie ass back on ban duty we have members to punish for our amusement(just kidding boys & girls).

Fun is fun, but I will not tolerate X-rated links or waste of times just to type stupid garbage. Post anything like this again Xeno and your out of here.

Formulalt1
F-Body Moderator

oh crap quat just happened here with xeno, is he being stupid or somthing, im lost john

He posted a link that was against AF guideline and as I said in my very first post the rules are the rules and they will have to be followed by everyone.


John

Its not a X-rated site. You should check it out before you start calling people out for that crap.

Btw: John just doesn't like me so he's trying to get me banned.

Its not a X-rated site. You should check it out before you start calling people out for that crap.

Btw: John just doesn't like me so he's trying to get me banned.Its X-rated vocals. I am not trying to get you banned and I have already proven that cause if I was I have more than enough ammo right now. Keep making accusations about me like that though and that will get you banned. Also asking someone not to bother them. While they are trying to work with IM every 10 minutes does not give you the right to attack my character.

John

Its not a X-rated site. You should check it out before you start calling people out for that crap.

Btw: John just doesn't like me so he's trying to get me banned.


If he wants you banned he can just ban you, he doesn't need to "try and get you banned"

hey xeno, dont try to start crap man especially not with a mod, rules are rules and he didnt ban you he let it slip so chill bro, not everyone likes everyone so we shouldnt point out fingers and say people are doing things to us because they dont like us

Fun is fun, but I will not tolerate X-rated links or waste of times just to type stupid garbage. Post anything like this again Xeno and your out of here.

Formulalt1
F-Body Moderator

Camaro Forum Banter Thread!

This entire thread is made up for fun. Funny I get picked out. I admit the link was off but the other stuff... *Shrug* they are posting pics of random crud too. :) Just a sense of hypocracy here.

:screwy: :screwy:

How bout we just drop it now, and move on to the next pointless topic? eh? how bout that?

I have already asked or removed and warned other member's. You are not the only one. If you feel because I don't like your harrassing of me outside AF that I will tolerate you posting whatever you see fit no matter what the rules say your sadly mistaken. Now I will say one last time drop this.

John

i agree josh, so how bout them eagles

I have already asked or removed and warned other member's. You are not the only one. If you feel because I don't like your harrassing of me outside AF that I will tolerate you posting whatever you see fit no matter what the rules say your sadly mistaken. Now I will say one last time drop this.

John


My... HARRASSING? What bull-crap is that? I havn't even IMed you since you made it clear last week. Wth kind of accusation is that? That is not harassment, that was an act of respect when I realized you were too busy to talk then. I think you should drop that subject if not even apologize for that accusation.

Asides that was my first and last post like that since you brought it to my attention. And my side is dropped now.

I would appreciate an apology but I doubt I'll get it.

This place is turning into a f-ing soap opera...I think it's time for a little vacation.

Any further problem with any members should be handled in PM's.

I am sorry this wasted all your time and Xeno just wanted it known that if he got banned it was because he thinks I don't like him which is not the case. So you have all already seen this and if anyone would like to discuss this please bring it to pm's .

Thank you,

John

Camaro Forum Banter Thread!

This entire thread is made up for fun. Funny I get picked out. I admit the link was off but the other stuff... *Shrug* they are posting pics of random crud too. :) Just a sense of hypocracy here.
Hmm lets see..... the pictures posted in the thread are all in good fun from af member to af memeber..... If John is trying to get you banned you wouldnt be posting in the forums still..... the world isnt against you.... Just yourself and well.... me now..... enjoy..... :thumbsup:

OK people, if we can't play nice, Im shutting it down...

xeno, none of us including formula have it out for you, one of the reasons moderators are here are to make sure questionable material is kept off the forums. he thought it was questionable so he removed it.


as far as I am concerned, this little spout is done. If someone feels neccary to continue it, I will shut down and delete this thread. Simple as that

Hypsi87
GM moderator

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v246/cuda_dude/john-kc1.gif HEHEHEHEHE

Nice work Cuda, thats great.

John

I was going to ask if lemonparty and goatse are off limits.... but now i just want to kill marcus.

lol....... gold put me up to it

yeah, it was a colaborative effort with cuda.. he's the photoshop king..
lol thanks, but your comming up in the ranks fast lil marcus

crap guys im the uglyest spice girl ...............

crap guys im the uglyest spice girl ...............now what was that about you saying "im the best looking" earlier?

I think little marcus, geno and big marcus are the most disturbing to look at in that order

*edit* got big marcus and pancho confused...

kasey, i find you disturbing to look at as well.. but hey.. "these gears kick ass!".. lol

hahahahahaha

yeah that video was definately one of the funnier things i have seen in awhile.. aside from this thread.. lol

*edit* got big marcus and pancho confused...
Im the one with the sunglasses all the way to the right, and Im only losing because it doesnt have my sexy hair, instead i got that stupid looking fro

ok.. scary spice with your face.. yeah.. scary spice with your face and your mohawk.. no.. i think shes scary enough..

damn last week i went to hollyweird to visit my cousin when i was driving and i see two fine girls getting into a stang, so i'm looking at them when all of a sudden i look infront of me and i barely avoided hitting a brand new bm745li, i seriously almost shit in my pants, but those two girls were fine ass hell.

damn last week i went to hollyweird to visit my cousin when i was driving and i see two fine girls getting into a stang, so i'm looking at them when all of a sudden i look infront of me and i barely avoided hitting a brand new bm745li, i seriously almost shit in my pants, but those two girls were fine ass hell.


Yeah bro,fine girlls like that walking around almost always almost get me into some type of accident,But sometimes us men tend to think with our other head.

common occurance.. women.. mustang.. not a great combo to tell you the truth..

I merged the damn girls thread cause it really could of just been posted in here to begin with but feel free to post about what ever you like as long as its not against the guidelines.

John

why doesnt this thread have a sticky now??

Your seeing things

i see it too

damn i guess i am.. that spice girl pic still has my eyes all messed up.. lol

so whats the rules in here? is this where we post all the trashy stuff like tastless jokes and stuff like that

Yup, anything not having to do with our cars or funny storys or good old fashion goofing around should be done here and very nice car Philly and you must live in Philly right?. Your pretty close to me.

i live in florida now but all of my family is still in philly. and thanks i just finished the inside last week now im waiting for my new g/e parts to get here so i can bolt them on and have the car re-painted.

since its all good and i got the thumbs up from a mod, i gotta joke to share...this girl and her father comes into a barber shop so he can get a haircut. while the father is getting his cut the little girl stands right next to the barber eating a twinky the entire time. after a few minutes go by the barber says to the girl... sweety if keep standing here your gonna get hair all over your twinky, and the little girl looks up and him and says... and ill also start to grow some tits too....lol

i know its sick but i found it funny as hell

lol

its funny in a sick way. Anyone else got any?

so a guy walks into a tire shop, points at his civic, and goes "hey i'd like a tire for my civic" and the shop owner replies "Eh sounds like a fair trade"

sounds like something i'd say..

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v246/cuda_dude/john-kc1.gif HEHEHEHEHE
KC what you doing down there?

so a guy walks into a tire shop, points at his civic, and goes "hey i'd like a tire for my civic" and the shop owner replies "Eh sounds like a fair trade"
Lame old joke:loser:

KC what you doing down there?
:licka: ,since john is the sexy spice..lol

i thought i would get more than 2 votes, come on i put my head on posh spice.. that alone should get me the win. lol

i used to have a thing for baby spice I dont think i'll ever look at her the same...

This little boy wakes up 3 nights in a row when he hears a thumping sound coming from his parents bedroom.

Finally one morning he goes to his mom and says : "Mommy, everynight I hear you and daddy making noise and when I look in you're bouncing up and down on him".

His mom is taken by surprise and says : " Oh... well I'm bouncing on his stomach because he's fat and that makes him thin again."

And the boy says, "That won't work."

His mom says, "Why?".

And the boy replies. "Because the lady next door comes by after you leave each day and blows him back up!"

ROFLMAO, thats great. I never heard that one

thats awesome...

That was good damon I got some for you guys

A firefighter is working on the engine outside the station when he
>notices a little girl next door in a little red wagon with little ladders
>hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.
>
> The girl is wearing a firefighter's helmet. The wagon is being pulled
>by her dog and her cat. The firefighter walks over to take a closer look.
> "That sure is a nice fire truck", the firefighter says with admiration.
>
> "Thanks", the girl says.
>
>
>
> The firefighter takes a closer look and notices the girl has tied her
>wagon to the dog's collar and the cat's testicles. "Little Partner", the
>firefighter says, "I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you
>were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go
>faster."
>
> The little girl replies thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but then
>I wouldn't have a siren.

> > Sperm Count
> >
> > A old man went to his doctor to get a sperm count. The doctor gave
> > the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a semen
>sample
> > tomorrow." The next day, the old geezer returned to the doctor's office
>and
> > gave
> > him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.
> > The doctor asked what happened, and the man explained, "Well, doc,
> > it's like this.....first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I
> > tried
> > with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She
> > tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She even tried
>with
> > her
> > mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still
>nothing.
> > We even called up Arlene, the lady next door, and she tried too, first
>with
> > both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeez'n it between her
> > knees, but
> > still nothing."
> > The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?!"
> > The old man replied, "Yep, but no matter what we tried, with our
> > arthritis, we still couldn't get the damn jar open."
> >

Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at
the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her
hair smells nice.

After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint
to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to write a sexual harassment grievance against him.

The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks,
"What's sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair
smells nice?"

The woman replies, "It's Kasey, the midget

Words for PMS

1. Pass My Shotgun


2. Psychotic Mood Shift


3. Perpetual Munching Spree


4. Puffy Mid-Section


5. People Make me Sick


6. Provide Me with Sweets


7. Pardon My Sobbing


8. Pimples May Surface


9. Pass My Sweatpants


10. Pissy Mood Syndrome


11. Plainly; Men Suck


12. Pack My Stuff


...and my favorite one...


13. Potential Murder Suspect

This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of

>in a long time. I think this guy should have been

>promoted, not fired.

>

>This is a true story from the WordPerfect Help line

>which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the

>customer care department. Needless to say, the Help

>Desk employee was fired however, he is currently suing

>the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without

>Cause." This is the actual dialogue of a former

>WordPerfect Customer Support employee (now I know why

>they record these conversations)

>

>"Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"

>"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

>"What sort of trouble?"

>"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden

>the words went away."

>Went away?"

>"They disappeared."

>"Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

>"Nothing."

>"Nothing?"

>"It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I type."

>"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

>"How do I tell?"

>"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

>"What's a sea-prompt?"

>"Never mind, can you move your cursor around the

>screen?"

>"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept

>anything I type."

>"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

>"What's a monitor?"

>"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like

>a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when

>it's on?"

>"I don't know."

>"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find

>where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

>"Yes, I think so."

>"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me ifit's plugged into

>the wall."

>"Yes, it is."

>"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice thatthere were two

>cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

>"No "

>"Well , there are. I need you to look back there again and find the

>other cable."

>"Okay, here it is."

>"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back

>of your computer."

>"I can't reach."

>"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

>"No."

>"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

>"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's because it's

>dark."

>"Dark?"

>"Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in

>from the window."

>"Well, turn on the office light then."

>"I can't."

>"No? Why not?"

>"Because there's a power failure."

>"A power....... a power failure?.... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked

>now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your

>computer came in?"

>"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet. "Good. Go get them, and unplug

>your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take

>it back to the store you bought it from."

>"Really? Is it that bad?"

>"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

>"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

>"Tell them you're too f****** stupid to own a computer

Three priests were in a railroad station on their way home to Pittsburgh. Behind the ticket counter was a very sexy, shapely, well endowed woman wearing a very tight, skimpy sweater. She made the three priests very nervous, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets.

The first priest approached the window. "Young lady! , I would like three Pickets to titsburg." He completely lost his composure and fled.

The second priest goes to the window. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nipples and dimes." Mortified.... he also fled.

The third priest moves to the window. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And, if you insist on dressing like that, when you get to the pearly gates, St. Finger's going to shake his Peter at you."

airline maiintenance

After every flight, Quantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe

sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The

mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and

then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.



Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here
are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Quantas' pilots and
the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers.

By the way, Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an
accident.

(P= The problem logged by the pilot.)

(S= The solution and action taken by mechanics.)


P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.


P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per
minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.


P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.


P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.


P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like
a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the
middle of nowhere, the
following people are suddenly stranded by, as you
might expect, a
shipwreck:
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 Chinese men and 1 Chinese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
One month later on these same absolutely stunning
deserted islands in
the middle of nowhere, the following things have
occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for
the Italian woman.
The two French men and the French woman are
living happily together in a
menage-a-trois.
The two German men have a strict weekly schedule
of alternating visits
with the German woman.
The two Greek men are sleeping with each other
and the Greek woman is
cleaning and cooking for them.
The two English men are waiting for someone to
introduce them to the
English woman.
The two Bulgarian men took one long look at the
endless ocean, and
another long look at the Bulgarian woman, and
started swimming.
The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are
awaiting instructions.
The two Chinese men have set up a pharmacy, a
liquor store, a restaurant
and a laundry, and have got the woman pregnant in
order to supply
employees for their stores.
The two American men are contemplating the
virtues of suicide because
the American woman keeps endlessly complaining
about her body; the true
nature of feminism; how she can do everything
they can do; the necessity
of fulfillment; the equal division of household
chores; how sand and
palm trees make her look fat; how her last
boyfriend respected her
opinion and treated her nicer than they do; how
her relationship with
her mother is improving and how at least the
taxes are low and it isn't
raining.
The two Irish men have divided the island into
North and South and set
up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is
in the picture because
it gets sort of foggy after the first few liters
of coconut whisky. But
they're satisfied because at least the English
aren't having any fun.

A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience
was different each week so the magician did the same
tricks over and over again. There was only one
problem: the captain's parrot saw the shows each
week
and began to understand how the magician did every trick.
Once he understood, he started shouting in the
middle
of the show. "Look, it's not the same hat!" or
"Look,
he's hiding the flowers under the table!" or "Hey,
whyare all the cards the ace of spades?"
The magician was furious but couldn't do anything.
Itwas, after all, the captain's parrot.
Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship
unfortunately sank, drowning almost all who were
onboard. The magician luckily found himself on a
piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea with,
as fate would have it, the parrot.
They stared at each other with hatred but did not
utter a word. This went on for a day... and then 2
days... and then 3 days.
Finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not
hold back any longer and said......
"OK, I give up. Where's the fucking ship?"