our doors won't unlock and the car won't start and my husband is locked inside, the lock smith can't open it and the BMW dealer has no idea what to do other than kick out the window...any ideas?

He's pressed the lock button by the shifter to see if that works, and tried physically opening the doors, right?

Try using the key slot in the trunk. Happened once to my 540 when it was extremely cold outside. . No idea why it worked (nor did my dealer have one), but it did.