Ok guys... This is it. PZC's very own Off-Topic thread.

Rules of the PZC Off-Topic Thread... None.

Unmoderated... Feel free to say anything you wish... Feel free to post whore your self to death... Hell, feel free to just post useless shit to get your post count up. I dont care.

Although, there is only ONE RULE of Fight Club... I mean PZC Off-Topic Thread. :D

DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT CARRY ARGUEMENTS OR CONVERSATIONS FROM THIS THREAD, INTO USEFULL THREADS IN PZC. IF THIS HAPPENS, THIS THREAD IS GONE.

Enjoy :D

-Wes

I'll be the first to post whore...

:D

-Wes

*Although, there is only ONE RULE of Fight Club... I mean PZC Off-Topic Thread.*

Broke_as_****: *sucker punches Sam8

Samhain: *knocked the **** out*

*Samhain gets off the ground*

*Looks Broke in the eye... And says*

"Im Samhain bitch!" *slap*

*Broke pulls out 9mm... Shoots Samhain in his left nut*

*And once again... Samhain is out for the count*

I cant win... :D

-Wes

Fuckers With Paintball Guns!!!

:p

-Wes... Is... The... Man... Why? Because I said I am!

go wes, go wes with 1000 posts!

Old People Cant Drive!!! I Swear. Do Not Let Anybody Get Behind The Wheel Of Your Z That Is Over The Age Of 35. Damn!!!!!!!!!!

oh wow, i just noticed where victoria british is located, in Lenexa, KS. that is about 20 minutes north of me, can i say, NO SHIPPING!!!

i *heart* boobs

lol...me too. beautiful females and z's. what more could you ask for? they kind of go hand in hand.

speak for yourself... i rarely get second looks from girls walkin down the street... must be the z31...

lol...you gotta get big ole 20" spinners yo. the b****es cant resist it. got to get mad bass too. i mean shit that will wake up the block.

true story: this s10 blazer drove past my house with his music up full blast and i have a porch. this thing knocked my wind chime and pictures off the wall. it was ridiculous. i can undertand a little bump in your step but that shit was ridiculous. maybe my house aint built well but either way it was ridiculous.

i used to be like that :D now i'm trying to sell the damn thing.. someone please buy it so i have enough money to move:(

i have heard a 15" solobaric L7 but this thing had to have atleast like 4 of those maxed out.

that guy's going to be deaf by... well probably the week after.. lol.. it's downright dangerous to ride in something that loud... if you don't blow an eardrum for some freak reason you'll probably rupture a soft organ..

I'm getting a really loud sound system for my car.

Its called my exhaust.

*imagines 2 1/2" straight back with some Borla pipes singing at the end*










*drool*

dude you're going to be freaking deaf lol

welcome to the world of the off-topic thread!
damn 88-91 civic forum's is at like 200 something pages and its the second one

yeah...its only been a few hours and we are already on page 2. thast strange for the past z forum. but im sure guys got alot more company over there in the civic lounge.

probally, ive always liked z's a buddy of mine had one back in the day. thing was fast as fuck

but im sure guys got alot more company over there in the civic lounge.

Well when a good 1/4 mile time for your car is 15 seconds, you tend to do more talkin then drivin.

lol...leave those guys alone broke. they do what they gotta do.

while your over here visiting jetts. my buddy has a del sol that he wants to make pretty quick. all he really wants to do is the best motor swap for his car. best meaning easiest but most reliable and affordable and powerful. what would be the best swap for his car?
he has wheels and all suspension. its pretty tight. no big ass spoilers or anything. he is trying to keep up with a few friends of mine and me. i have a buddy with a 350z, k20 in a new civic, m3, 300gt vr4, and me with soon to be TTZ. so what would be the best swap and mods to get him up there in low 14's, high 13's?

beats me, i dont know shit about delsols

i thought most of the civics and del sols of the same year had the same drivetrain.

probably the b16a3, it came from the vtec del sols(i think) and it would drop right in place of his motor (can't remember what it's called) and would most likely be the easiest swap... altho, if he wants to do any sort of boosting(above say 7 psi) he's going to need to start looking into internals or perhaps a different engine (b18b: can go up to 12 psi on stock internals with a beefy fuel system and other essential mods) but i'm not sure what it would take for one of those to fit in there... if he's looking to stay n/a, he could probably use the b16a3 and hit up some cams, and intake manifold plus all the other regular mods (i/h/e) no clue how fast that would get him tho, them little bastards are light... easy to make fast with the right engine...i'm a little rusty on my honda speak, so don't take my word as gospel

honad owns ju! i get second looks for women all the time. except this one chick i have been talking to for a while now, she doesn't like my car because i love my car soo much.

-Jared

GUYS STAY ON TOPIC HERE :D

Poop shot out of the mountain, all over Brittney Spears butt, then the World cried 'the mud butt is here!' the Mrs. BS relized she was nothing anymore, so she hung herself in her cousins, friends, brothers former roommate in colleges closet, and when the media found her they laughed and said 'good ridence you slob' so no one cares about her anymore, then the worms came and ate her, still no funeral, now all that is left of this 'artist' is a pile of bones, and the stench of mud butt.

... Since were back on topic.

-Wes

BACK-ON-TOPIC HERE: I don't even have a radio in my Zed....

1viadrft, did you get my E-Mail for the ZedEx Crew signature?

Check it boyee.

By the way... Where the hells LLTZ been?

-Wes

i just got a haircut... and DAMN i look good...


oh yeah and i'm really modest too:rolleyes:

LLTZ said he dont get on here as much because he is a zillion times busy. i guess he is a little to busy for his Z too. i think ill go pick it up while he is sleeping.

FS: anybody wanna buy some clear corner lights for the z32? i got some for sale. or how about a front bumper? has a very minor crack on the passenger side. best offer takes both. ill put it in the classified's too.

1viadrft, did you get my E-Mail for the ZedEx Crew signature?

Check it boyee.

By the way... Where the hells LLTZ been?

-Wes

What e-mail? I didn't get it! Send again... oh you know what? My friend in Okinawa sent me a bunch of pix so maybe my e-mail got clogged... send again!

i am so sad right now, read my "not a very good weekend" thread.

-Jared

Did your puppy die?

READ THE DAMN THREAD!!! i will make it easy for you lazy people http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=295429

-Jared

Please see my reply...

Do you guys have girlfriends? Wives? That kinda stuff?

single... plan on keeping it that way for the next... well until i change my mind lol

Girlfriend... Plan on keeping it that way for the next... Well until I change my mind, haha :D

O, George, see you got it anyways :p

-Wes

George, go in your sig and space the ZedEx crew logo down... So its not right next to your pic, its annoying me :D

-Wes

George, go in your sig and space the ZedEx crew logo down... So its not right next to your pic, its annoying me :D

-Wes

GO TO HELL, MONGERAL!

There... better?

I'm feeling destructive!

Yuh... I have a 'fiancee'... three years together... she get's on my nerves... this may be the last straw...

i have a girlfriend type thing. we act as though we are going out, but we really aren't going out. it is one of those weird high school things, i like it becuase i can mess with other girls and not get in trouble. MUAHAHAHA.

-Jared

sigh... to be young again.... I was a total fuckin' player back in my day... probably still can be!

I don't know about all that crap, I'm still at the point in my life where a long term relationship means she's still there in the morning.

sigh... to be young again.... I was a total fuckin' player back in my day... probably still can be!

Careful, pimping the elderly is a crime. Not to mention disgusting.

IT IS NOT A CRIME! LoL

I'm not that old, dork... I'll be 24 this December... speaking of which how old are all you dorks?

19




CHECK THE ****ING PROFILE! THATS WHY WE ****ING HAVE THEM!!!!!!!!!



Putz








:D

yeah, i am the youngest one here, 16!

-Jared

I must be one of the oldest here then, huh... screw-off, broke! :p If I wanted to do all that... I would have done it! Wanker! Just trying to strike conversation here!

17... Halloween I'll be 18 :D

I LOVE FUCKING HALLOWEEN... Hence my screen name.

Heres an idea... Post pics of yourself!

-Wes

you asked for it...

Heres an idea... Post pics of yourself!

You would defile this board in such a manner?

yeah, really. the only peole who could post pics is women, and i think karen512 is the only woman z owner around here.

-Jared

wHATEVER HAPPEND TO THAT OTHER CHICK? iF YOU REALLY WANNA SEE PIX OF ME... cHECK OUT MY cARDOMAIN... i'M ABOUT 10LBS OVERWEIGHT THERE THOUGH... i'M WORKING OUT NOW SO i'M NOT ALL jABBA tHE hUTT...

/\ Is staring at his hit counter on Car Domains, refreshing every 2 seconds.

< is laughing at /\

\/ Is a putz

WTF are you on? So what about my counter? It's a nearly stock 2+2... what do you expect, you mongoloid?

you mongoloid

That kind of like a bongo player?

Yeah... a special one....

aw man and i was going to flood this with useless random pics of me too... I HATE YOU ALL

hey delerious, how long does it take for a video at trackdaymedia.com to become authorized?

-Jared

few days to a week... wasn't paying much attention until someone asked me for the vid

damn, i wanna post it right now!

-Jared

DO IT DO IT DO IT :D

I'll post some pics of me in the middle of a jam session... Scary shit dudes

-Wes

allllriiiightttt if you insist!

DO IT DO IT DO IT :D

I'll post some pics of me in the middle of a jam session... Scary shit dudes

-Wes

:D Two guys with bow ties, one on banjo the other on kazoo.

well, here's me on any normal day...
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609normal-med.JPG

uh oh... you caught me on my way out... now i'm pissed off
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609agitated-med.JPG

here's me dreaming of my ttz
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609thoughtful-med.JPG

sometimes my hands don't do what i tell them to.. the doctors say it's completely normal...
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609happy-med.JPG

oooh... now you gone and done it... you reversed earth's gravitational pull
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609defying_gravity-med.JPG

shortly after this shot was taken the dog mauled me... and someone said she was trained...
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609me_with_mutt-med.JPG

here's me with the z... yes really am a vampire and no that's not redeye
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609me_with_z-med.JPG

yes that really is 42 empty pop cans... this is where i do my greatest evil
http://files.automotiveforums.com/gallery/watermark.php?file=/503/154609mode_of_destruction-med.JPG

hahahahaha like i said... completely random and useless.... if you don't like it take it up with wes... he provoked me!

Hmm...you seem to have an odd fungus growing under your chin. I suggest you see a dermatologist.

he has odd fungus? what until i take a recent pic of myself. i don't have any, don't like pics. i might take one soon, maybe.

-Jared

Today at work: Pair of jackoffs come in lookin for some custom cabinets. They have atleast half a brain in their heads because they came to where I work, which is a custom cabinet shop. So i was doing the salesman schtick even though thats not my job and these old farts, some sand-in-the-vagina,-crotch-rash old bitch and her faggoty much-too-arrogant-for-a-guy-I-could-whip-blindfolded husband. Yeah, I'm 19 and I was wearing some baggypants and a hood but for the love of whatever pagan god they worshiped, if another asshole tries to talk down to me like that I'm going to toss their old ass out into the damn street. Or yesterday, some jackass who had flown up from California came in with his "Project Manager" to "discuss modular cabinetry options" for some shitty 1970s era condo remodel they're doing. I'm sitting there looking at this tiny ass kitchen and two dinky bathrooms thinking "Are you really trying to get me to kiss your ass over this tiny pissant job?". Really, we do like half million to 1.5 million dollar homes. We build some nice ****in cabinets. People will order upwards of $100,000 worth of custom cabinets sometimes. Like we ****in need some worthless little cunt like him?


BTW, Man on Fire is a great movie. Go buy the DVD right now. Denzel Washington just starts MURDERIN! those mofos. Like when hes standin up in the corner of that building with a ****** *****ing RPG.

got on a little late but im 18 yrs old and i have had my gf for little over a year. dont you hate when older people talk down to you like your the scum of the world? pisses me the f*** off too. im wearing a goody and my pants arent hugging my crotch so that means i have the intelligence of an average 14 year old. f*** em' all.

For Example: I went and looked at a z31 86T. and i asked the dealer to let me drive to see if i liked it. (keep in mind, i dont have my car so i am driving a rent-a-car lincoln LS.) this mother f***** had nerve to tell me that he thought it was alittle too fast for me and it is rear wheel drive so he didnt think that would be the wisest idea. he also went on to say how i am probably just some immature kid that wants to take it for a joy ride.

thats when i blew up. finally, he apologized after i furociously explained to me how i own a z32 and i plan on doing a TT swap and how i could run circles around his head with my knowledge of z's comapred to his. also, explained to him how people like him do not deserve to walk the face of the earth, lol. just a little humor for me.

you guys have problems with adults talking you down? i have a huge problem with that. the only adults that give me respect are the ones that know me personally, all the other ones just look at me as a regular kid.

-Jared

people are stupid. just cause they have one bad experience with a teen doesnt meant that all teens deserve to be treated like that.

anybody want some clear corners for their z32? i paid a little over a $100 for them only about 2 months old or so. Best Offer takes it. goin once, going twice..........

You know what helps alot? The fact that they usually walk in and see me sitting behind the computer with the CAD drafting program on it and a couple of spec built house plans around me. Thats not so much respect as it is idiots being intimidated by something they know nothing about.

can someone find me a decent paying job??? i quit about a month ago to do certain circumstances. i thought it would be easy but it aint turning out that way.

Are you willing to be a test subject?

depends on the test??? lol. anybody have any ideas. what kind of places are hiring around this time? i tried to get in at the local nissan dealership to maybe get some discounts on parts but they arent hiring right now. they said come back in february due to soem of their employees who play baseball.

people are stupid. just cause they have one bad experience with a teen doesnt meant that all teens deserve to be treated like that.

anybody want some clear corners for their z32? i paid a little over a $100 for them only about 2 months old or so. Best Offer takes it. goin once, going twice..........

$50!

1via...check your PM box and PM me back or email me.

Done deal!

1via you cheap sob! pay the man what they're worth!

1via you cheap sob! pay the man what they're worth!

You're just jealous 'cus you are not gonna have clear corners, Z31-Boy! Bwahahahahahahahahaha! :loser:

I found some free poop on the sidewalk today...

-Wes

If its yours its not really finding it Sam.

hey k3, try and apply at autoparts stores. that would be a great place to work.

yeah i would but most of the places around here are filled with dumbasses that live in a run-down mobile home out in the middle of nowhere. im serious. i dont think i would work to well with them. if worst coems to worst i might apply.

yeah i don't think i'd do to well in an autoparts shop... just too many idiots coming in and asking for huge ass mufflers or BIG SHOTS OF NOS for their pos grocery getter... i'd probably be way to opinionated to be working there for long, most likely freak out on some punk kid or just snap one day and start shooting...

mmmm, good point delerious. i would probably just laugh at all the kids buying APC stuff. but think about it, a hot girl walks in, she desperately needs help with her car and of course she doesn't know anything about it, and this hot chick comes up to you for your help. then you go out to her car and start to tell her what is wrong even though she won't understand, but then, she will be ever grateful that you helped her. hell, tell her to give you road head for helping her.

-Jared

*sits there laughing as freak gets a faceful of mace and fired in the same day*

I'm joing Empire Z today... that kinda has a ring to it, huh?

I THINK EVERYONE IN THIS FORUM SHOULD BE A ZED EX MEMBER..... What do you think, Wes?

:wave: here here! i agree!

oh by the way.. wes is that name change happening anytime soon? no pressure just wondering..

Name change?

hai!!! a while back wes said he might be able to get one of the other mods to change my name to Delerious... which would be nice considering i don't own no integra anymore...

Yuh me too.... I don't own a one-via anymore either! I wanna be "TorqueMonsterZ32"... how about it, Wes?

I THINK EVERYONE IN THIS FORUM SHOULD BE A ZED EX MEMBER..... What do you think, Wes?

wes and i already talked about that, and we are gonig to keep it exclusive to a few people. it wouldn't be much of a special crew if everybody on pzc was a member.

-Jared

Yea me and Jared talked on the phone about it... And kind of agreed on 5 or 6 members.

(I've added on in my head lately Jared)

As for the name change Delerious... Im not sure what happened there, I talked to Aves911 (administrator) about it twice, and he said no problem... And yet your still D93I.

Send a PM to Aves911 and ask him personally... I think it may be more effective. Hes on the forum a lot, so he'll get it soon I think.

I'll get back to you on the Crew thing... Gotta discuss it with the other Crew members.

-Wes

wes and i already talked about that, and we are gonig to keep it exclusive to a few people. it wouldn't be much of a special crew if everybody on pzc was a member.

-Jared


That's kinda snobby.... :mad: I mean I can understand not having the noobs as members... but what about the other regulars?

i am calling wes right now. but there will be a couple select others that will be part of the crew.

*EDIT* well, i called him and he didn't answer and there was no answering machine :sly:

-Jared

Yea sorry dude, went out running...

I called you back, but no answer, I'll try again in a bit.

-Wes

well, me and wes talked and decided to let all the seasoned members be part of the zedex crew, you all should get a pm soon from him for the sig tag.

-Jared

Also a thought that came to mind is this,

Lets think of a crew that everyone can be in... Newbies, anyone. Heres what i'll do:

I will make a closed sticky, so that anyone who so desires can copy and paste the URL and Text into their signature.

Now for a name... What do you guys think?

'PZC Crew'

Something else?

-Wes

i like "PZC Crew", i like names that aren't outrightly tell you what they are.

-Jared

sounds good to me but how do you guys get the words to show up in different colors and in bigger letters and what not. i cant figure it out. sorry im a newb.

Edit: nevermind guys....i figured it out. damn vb codes.

As for the name change Delerious... Im not sure what happened there, I talked to Aves911 (administrator) about it twice, and he said no problem... And yet your still D93I.

Send a PM to Aves911 and ask him personally... I think it may be more effective. Hes on the forum a lot, so he'll get it soon I think.


will do man, thanks

I just saw a site that was advertising B18Cs for 4500 ****ing dollars. A pussy 210hp and no torque for 4500 ****ing dollars. What the hell is that? Same site, the K20C out of the RSXs $6750! WTF! Are people really paying this kind of money for these engines? You could to a complete race spec VG build for that kind of cash.

http://www.hybrid-racing.com/images/gallery/watch_video.jpg
sad but true... those k20 swapped hatch's are fast mofo's... sound like crap, look like crap, but they're fast nonetheless..

i have a buddy that did the GSR motor in his civic hatch and wasted my other buddies 350z with bald tires. he spun through most of first and a little bit of second. ridiculous.

BTW: wes, how much can you get an rb20det front clip for with your supplier?

rb20det? what are you plotting k3?

Nothing stupid I hope.

honda civics, the first mod is an engine swap.


-Jared

not much. my buddy just wanted me to get a price on one for his 240sx and then DBSS gohan also wanted to get a price for one.

i was thinking about putting one in my 300zx. lol.

I guess since I am not exclusive enough for the ZedEx gang. Ill throw on the PZC crew sig. I don't really post that much I mostly read. But maybe one day I'll post more often and show off the PZCness.

Haha, sweet dude.

O as for the prices...

RB20DET is $2,295

-Wes

thanks wes...

first person to find me some 19x8.5 and 19x9.5 wheels that are flat black (no polished lip) for under $1200 for just the wheels i will send $5 in the mail. also, make them somewhat lightweight. maybe 20lbs or somewhere around there.

i cannot find anything. the ones that i really want are 18's but it would be alot cheaper for me if i just buy 19's because i already have a practically brand new set of nitto555 tires.

Found some, they're listed in sizes 19"x8.5" through 19"x10.5" and claim to be 16 lbs. (http://img34.exs.cx/img34/2167/awesomerims.jpg)

Now wheres my money. :D

:lol::lol: hahaha nice one broke...

LOL...thats too funny. try again though.

don't ever get in a spray paint fight. it sucks to get off your skin, lol. oh well, it was fun.

-Jared

In retrospect I wish I had wrote "DEEZ RIMZ R MAD UBER JDM TYTE DUMBASS!' over the top.

broke, are you making fun of me?

I found some 19" rims, but there are only two of them and they don't quite go on a 300zx more like a huffy. Or something you might pedal. I'll keep looking.

broke, are you making fun of me?

Of course not.








DUMBASS! :D

don't ever get in a spray paint fight. it sucks to get off your skin, lol. oh well, it was fun.

-Jared

spraypaint fight? what are you... american?? err... *looks around*...... uh oh

hey delerious I read this thing in a guys sig, it was your quote that said something like "if jdm is so great why doesn't everyone have one" or something to that effect. Guess that was kind of pointless to say that. oh well

"if dsm is so great, then why doesn't everyone own one!" is the quote... not sure why it's so funny.. or why it's actually in there.. but meh, whatever makes him happy

Of course not.








DUMBASS! :D

*k3smostwanted calls the nearest pharmacy to try and diagnose broke's brain illness for him*
broke the pharmasict says you might want to start taking ridilin.

On the subject of medicine and disease, I was watching Becker and There is a behavior disease called aspurgars. (Pronounced like assburgers) but that is what they were calling it and joking around i thought it was kind of funny. AssBurger to go please.

omg, keep it real, straight up pimp mode, represent, on the flip side E.cat

this fucking spray paint won't come off of my finger nails, it is a bitch to get off. i will never do that again.






okay, maybe i will.

-Jared

*k3smostwanted calls the nearest pharmacy to try and diagnose broke's brain illness for him*
broke the pharmasict says you might want to start taking ridilin.

An army of mental health professionals couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, I doubt your local dealer is going to have answers. And I was lucky to grow up before the child drug crazy so I missed out on being doped up on downers 24/7 because my parents were concerned that I wasn't acting like the book said I should be. Frankly if you tried to diagnose whatever is loose inside my head you would hit the road block about the time I was spliting lanes between cars at 100 mph on one wheel.




Good times :cool:

lol...its all good. craziness isnt always a bad thing? i wanna see some crazy videos once your car is back on the road. :naughty:

Video of me sliding it sideways 100mph the wrong way down a highway offramp with the rears on fire and the entire Seattle police department on my ass?

Will do :thumbsup:

only 100?? pshhhh

Broke_as_****: <--- Going to Germany for 3 weeks in April. Plane tickets, room and board, food, and all other expenses: Paid. AND I'm getting a paycheck for going.

Broke_as_****: <--- Renting a Porsche and hitting the autobahn. :cool:

bastard...

does anybody think that some laws need to be ammended or reversed?

for example:
in my area, tinted windows is illegal for this reason-they are an obstruction of view to the driver. but in retrospect, the driver can see fine out of tinted windows.

also, neon lights are illegal because it distracts other drivers's eyes off the road. but think about it, how many billboards and signs do you pass on the highway. how many semi-trucks pass you on the highway telling you that you can lose 10lbs in 10 days. these things dont take your eyes off the road.

in my area, you cant have your headlights shorter lower than 18 or 20" off the ground. WTF, WHY?

you cant have anything hanging from your rear view mirror because it is obstruction ov view. SO....thats their choice is it not?

your turn signals must be amber...no reason, just because. WHY? as long as the person behind me or in front of me knows i am turning, right???

seatbelt law...because it saves lives. shouldnt this be the persons perogative to wear a seatbelt. if he wants to risk it. that is that person's choice.

noice distubance for a car...loud stereo systems. why is that such a bid deal? a person outside of their house has to hear your car for a whole 2 seconds before it goes away. lol.

in conclusion, i think our government and police officers need to stop wasting their time with petty laws. our taxes are paying these people to sit around and make stupid laws like these up.

I don't know about most of that. I know that the reason behind the amber signals was they didn't want anyone confusing them with reverse or head lights. How the hell you're going to do that I don't know. The tinted windows is pretty much the same thing as having front and rear plates, just a bunch of cops getting their power trip hard ons. I guess you could make a case that with tinted windows prevent the cop from seeing if there is someone holding a gun inside. Frankly I don't know how they justify sitting out in the middle of nowhere at two in the morning putting up a speed trap when my area has the highest concentration of meth labs in the country.

right, i understand the real reasons for most of these laws but i dont know why they dont write that in the book. ok..about the tinted windows though...you can have your back windows tinted. so you could still be holding a gun aimed at the officer without him seeing it until you got all the way to the window.
turn signals...ok why doesnt the law say that you cant have them white or clear? im not saying i would do this but i think a blue light or purple turn signal will serve the same purpose as an amber bulb.

Upholding the the status quo. One could draw the conclusion that most law makers see little reason to change as time passes.

i say they make all those laws so pigs could have more power. we all now they love the power fix.

-Jared

Random stupid things

Fat people: Stop. Eating. BigMacs. You got a nice gut, thats fine, you can't play with yourself without a full length mirror, you got a ****in problem.

Long shipping delays: I know I shipped it ground but I don't see how that ****in justifies it taking a shoe box sized package over a month to get 1500 some miles when you can cover half that in one day easy.

Morons: Really, what the hell?

Mormons: Really, what the hell?

Catholic priests molesting choir boys: Now WTF is this ****? You know how you can effectively deal with this type of problem? Round up these perverts, drag them out to the street and give em all a pair of 9mms to the back of the head. Or if that is too much of a mess, just toss they ass out the side of a 747 over the Atlantic.

20oz of bottled water: $1.35, 1 gal of bottled water: $0.99: How the **** does that work?

Britney Spears: No talent. Check. Took the dumb blonde sterotype to a whole new level. Check. Does "pre-teen oriented" stage shows that are equivilant to lousy soft-core porn. Check. Verdict: Drown her in her own silicone.

Paris Hilton: No judgement needed, actions speak for themselves. All debate will be centered around the most outlandish death possible for this waste of oxygen.

Infomercials: Whats so informative about them. I already know that I do NOT want to buy a Mirical knife set.

Lousy TV shows: No one loves Raymond. Everyone hates Raymond. Everyone would like to drown Raymond in boiling anti-freeze.

$300 performance chips: Your entire R&D cost was 4 1/2 dynos pulls to **** with the injection map and timing a bit. You removed the stock speed limiter. I guess that really justifies charging a couple hundred for a mircochip that costs .0001 of a cent.

Herpes: Just not cool.

Activation fees and free phones: Okay, it costs NOTHING to build and distribute complex, compact phones but it costs $150 to punch a few buttons on a keyboard. And these people wonder why we think they're full of ****.

Insurance costs: I have a perfect driving record and more track time (where you REALLY learn to drive) then all of lower Utah combined. Why the HELL am I paying more than a thirty two year old female with two DUIs?

Complete ****in lack of police just ****in beating the mother****ing ever loving **** out of dip****s: Really, you and a thousand other morons get wasted after your team botches the playoffs and you start thrown bottles, you need a solid kick to the ass.

Tailgaters: Unless you are a trim, athletic 34-26-35 with brown hair and green eyes, GET OFF MY ASS!

Complete lack of background music in daily life: When I walk into a room, I want my theme music playing. And when I'm doing 150 down a two lane logging road, I want techno. Hard, ear ripping, cornea rupturing techno.

**** throwing monkeys: Why the hell do we have to take this from animals that we beat down on the evolutionary timeline?

Rappers wearing dogtags: Guess you're really a soldier now! Nevermind the fact that if you even even saw a gun you'd **** your pants.

Societal hang ups on gay marriage: The two chicks/guys want to get married. Okay, whoop dee shit.

Michael Moore/Rush Limbaugh: So were these two retards seperated at birth or what?

The food at AM/PM: Is it just me or does this stuff taste like ass to everyone?

The ****ers on TV promising that you too can experience the power of god if you send them money: I thought it was agreed that all these jackoffs were to be castrated with acid?

Comedy Central taking Mystery Science Theater off the air: The channel that is centered around comedy takes the one funny show they had off the air. That is ****in brilliant.

Family Guy getting cancelled: Everyone loved it. It was a great show. One of the best shows ever on TV. WTF happened?

Pre-packaged, ready to buy sub-cultures for social outcasts: Hey lets all dress like the latest world wide distributed, major label signed, MTV ass kissing no talent hack pop-punk band! Its even cooler because we can find all of their personal clothing line at the mall! We'll really be rebelious anti-mainstream then!

Dr. Phil: Okay Mr. arrogant chrome dome, you got 30 seconds to make your peace with god before you meet him in person. Go. (Anyone who has seen "Man on fire" just think of the "I wish you had more time" scene, Denzel is just such a badass).

Ricers: Lets spend alot of money on making our cars look fast without actually being fast then brag about how fast they are. If you want to build a showy car and brag about the sound system, more power to you. If you want to try and tell me that the 5" chrome tip on your otherwise stock exhaust is giving you "mad power yo", you're getting your ass beat.

Clay Aiken: The whole world knows man, you can go ahead and come out of the closet.

Long annoying lists of stupid things other people hate that have no relevance or meaning to me and that I would generally like see cramed down the authors throat: Nuff said.

i have one more thing to add with the 20 oz. bottled of water being more expensive than a gallon of bottled water.

at a gas station where a 20 oz. of pop is $1 and a 2 Liter of pop is $1.19 or you could go to the fountain and get 64 oz. of pop for $1.

the only reason i get a 20 oz. is because the z has no cup holders for a fountain drink and i can't fit a 2 Liter pop bottle behind my backseats. anybody wanna buy me this (http://courtesyparts.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=CP&Product_Code=ZX9096PC) for christmas?

-Jared

I've already seen some k3s... You havent seen the videos? God where have you been!

... O videos of his CAR... Ooooo... *ackward silence*

Jared, I cant say I've ever been in a SPRAY PAINT fight... Ummm... Can I ask what the hell was going through your mind :D

-Wes

Clay Aiken: The whole world knows man, you can go ahead and come out of the closet.



Im not sure about this one... But the rest were true.

This chic my oldest brother knows dated him before and during the whole American Idol thing... She would come into my work weaing homemade "Vote for Clay!" shirts... This was before he was even on TV.

So I dont know about THAT one... But the rest were true.

-Wes

She was just camouflage, Aiken trying to appear normal. Besides even if that wasn't the case, people change. You know how much time he spent with that sweaty, faggot blimp Ruben?








*shudder*

lol....nice list broke. made my day.

my wheel offer is still on the table. can anybody explain why motegi doesnt make wheels that will fit on rear wheel drive cars. i want there track lites in flat black but they only make them in 7.5" wide. WTF is that?

most motegi rims are ungodly heavy... more for show than performance.... i'd know

yeah but these trak lites only weighed in at 17lbs or soemthing for 19's. that aint bad. they look decent too. the only problem is that they only make them for front wheel drives cars. gay.

most wheel compaines are only making fwd wheels just because of the amount of fwd vehicles out there today. thats why i am glad there is volk and ssr.

-Jared

yeah but most people dont have the money to pay for some freaking 800 dollar a wheel volks or racing hart's. id like some racing hart 3-piece CX's in black but they cost like $1000 a wheel.

this is what i did today. first time ever, it was awesome!
http://img26.exs.cx/img26/7203/108_811_LR.jpg

-Jared

i'm sure that'd be awesome to go to in person, but i don't think there's been a single time when i haven't fallen asleep attempting to watch any sort of nascar on tv, unless it's the tech talk stuff

Watch some WRC races. Badass

yep, i'd have to say that rally drivers are probably some of the most skilled drivers on the planet

well u no waht y all suck whoohoo please dont beat me up!!!how can i get into zedex.COM!!!!!???any1?

Well, owning a Z would help.

That and stepping just a few feet to your left...no, your other left, farther towards the killzone...

*1,000 yards away Broke flicks the rifle off safe"

NASCAR????? WTF? I'd rather watch golf! Plus half-of those rednekians don't even know what a Z is! JGTC anyone?

WRC is bad-ass! Petter's taking it home again!

hey, i got free tickets, so might as well. plus, i like going to any type of racing. but it was pretty funny seeing all the hicks.

-Jared

i want some free stuff. i think we should start up a nation wide z club. i mean HUGE. then we can all get sponsorships once we become known.

*ahem* international

ok...nationwide and we will include delerious because he is such a nice guy. :D

theeeere we go :D ;)

you find my wheels yet delerious??? i might have to retract my statement about you being a nice guy if you dont find my wheels.

actually i was looking on the rays site but i figured out after a while that flat black is a rare commodity on the $600+ per rim.. rims.. lol

hmmm what about these ones? i know they have a polished lip but...

http://www.1010tires.com/wheel.asp?wheelbrand=RH+Evolution&wheelmodel=GT5+%2D+Flat+Black&pc=RHGT5E99551425F

little expensive...id rather have the ADR cyphers in gunmetal. i can pick those up for like $700.

id like something like this. i might just have to get these and try selling my tires. http://www.wheelsnext.com/product.phtml?p=894

well i tried!

thanks man...i appreciate it. some contact 5zigen or motegi and tell them to make there all black wheels in 19x9.5 and 19x8.5. ill keep looking.

hey hey! anyone notice something different about me?

Yea Delerious, you shit your pants three days ago and haven't changed them yet. JK

K3 your on my shit list...What's with this people over 35 not driving Z's?
You have 2 years to retract that statement or you'll be hearing from my mommy.

How do you become a ZedX member?

after you have been here for a while and it seems that you know a lot about the z car and the pzc forums, then the zedex members will talk about you becoming a member.

i like the wheels that delerious posted, those are nice.

-Jared

But may I ask why 19"?

because i have brand new 19" tires just lying there. so i can find some nice wheels for like a grand or less. save me big money.

i retract my statement about people over 35 yrs old cant drive. people over 35 cant drive except for zgringo. lol. that better?

yeah k3 was looking for 19's... so i found him 19's... you want me to find you 14's? i'll find you 14's... lol

btw, who's member #5 anyway?

It's about time your damned name changed!

Yer lucky, cause my mama would riped yer balls off fer say'n bad things 'bout her baby.

Delerious, have you changed your pants yet?

not yet, haven't gotten off my ass in 4 days... actually i can't even feel my legs anymore..

post

whoring

donvitofigamaroogarbumbumbumwooo

I just relized I have more posts than the moderator...:p

However...I saw someone in another forum with over 14,000 posts!!! Now THAT'S a shit load of posts.

It'd be cool if I made a whole page of just MY posts...

1150!!!

...but that would take waaaaaaaaaay too long. Screw that.

damn you...you have just a FEEEEEEEEW more than me...

22 actually

And I've been a member waaaaaaaaaay longer than you...go figure. Kinda wish I didn't join this site then not come back for...like...6 months like I did...oh well

yeah i'm just a whore

21 now

ha ha...20!

:p This is how bored I am right now...

Boredom = a visit to the autotrader website...

AutoTrader is your friend!
I have bought 2 cars I found in AutoTraders.

whoa...easy there llz. the only thing worse then posting all those is me being a dumbass and actually reading all those like you had something interesting to say. lol

now that is annoying post whoring. if you are going to post a lot of stuff like that, at least make it something halfway decent so that stupid people like me or k3 can read and get some entertainment. and oh yeah, zedex member #5 is broke, but nooooo, he is too cool to put the tag in his sig.

-Jared

i think he felt the urge to make up for all the posts he has been missing out on, beings he is too busy for us Z guys anymore. :D

lol...he comes back and he is already picking fights with the new guys. lol.:rolleyes:

http://www.automotiveforums.com/img/jgtc/jgtc1.jpg

ok i want those wheels i think, they look huge so they got to be 19's...350z and the 300zx can share the same wheels correct. so where the hell did that guy get those wheels damnit?

i hope i can get my car fixed tomorrow :(

BAck on page 5 you all younger whipper-snappers have problems with older people talking down to you. I have a problem with talking down to EVERYONE. This comes from a I am better than you attitude that I picked up in College ROTC at New Mexico Military Institute....... Dont suggest it, not for everyone. But I did learn something in college besides getting girls was never so easy, thats "Napalm sticks to kids" we had that on our Ranger team shirts, I loved it. I want it in my Z32s rear window.

oh man, if you liked that, you'll love this... sorry for the huge length but it's well worth it..

The 213 Things Skippy is No Longer Allowed to Do in the U.S. Army
SGT Shawn Stanford
Once upon a time, there was a SPC Schwarz stationed with the Army in the Balkans. SPC Schwarz was either very clever or very bored; but probably both, since he managed to attempt or be warned about 213 things he wasn't allowed to do. He collected those things into a hillarious list and posted them to the web. The site hadn't been updated in a couple of years and has since gone away; but the list is classic, so I saved it. A couple favorites: 2. My proper military title is 'Specialist Schwarz' not 'Princess Anastasia'. and 191. Our Humvees cannot be assembled into a giant battle-robot.
Not allowed to watch Southpark when I'm supposed to be working.
My proper military title is 'Specialist Schwarz' not 'Princess Anastasia'.
Not allowed to threaten anyone with black magic.
Not allowed to challenge anyone's disbelief of black magic by asking for hair.
Not allowed to get silicone breast implants.
Not allowed to play 'Pulp Fiction' with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.
Not allowed to add 'In accordance with the prophesy' to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me.
Not allowed to add pictures of officers I don't like to War Criminal posters.
Not allowed to title any product 'Get Over it'.
Not allowed to purchase anyone's soul on Government time.
Not allowed to join the communist party.
Not allowed to join any militia.
Not allowed to form any militia.
Not allowed out of my office when the president visited Sarajevo.
Not allowed to train adopted stray dogs to 'Sic Brass!'
Must get a haircut even if it tampers with my 'Sampson like powers'.
God may not contradict any of my orders.
May no longer perform my now (in)famous 'Barbie Girl Dance' while on duty.
May not call any officers immoral, untrustworthy, lying, slime, even if I'm right.
Must not taunt the French any more.
Must attempt to not antagonize SAS.
Must never call an SAS a 'Wanker'.
Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
Must not tell any officer that I am smarter than they are, especially if it's true.
Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
Never tell a German soldier that 'We kicked your ass in World War 2!'
Don't tell Princess Di jokes in front of the paras (British Airborne).
Don't take the batteries out of the other soldiers alarm clocks (Even if they do hit snooze about forty times).
The Irish MPs are not after 'Me frosted lucky charms'.
Not allowed to wake an Non-Commissioned Officer by repeatedly banging on the head with a bag of trash.
Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.
Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.
Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
(Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
Not allowed to sing 'High Speed Dirt' by Megadeth during airborne operations. ('See the earth below/Soon to make a crater/Blue sky, black death, I'm off to meet my maker')
Can't have flashbacks to wars I was not in. (The Spanish-American War isn't over).
Our medic is called 'Sgt Larwasa', not 'Dr. Feelgood'.
Our supply Sgt is 'Sgt Watkins' not 'Sugar Daddy'.
Not allowed to ask for the day off due to religious purposes, on the basis that the world is going to end, more than once.
I do not have super-powers.
'Keep on Trucking' is *not* a psychological warfare message.
Not allowed to attempt to appeal to mankind's baser instincts in recruitment posters.
Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.
I am not the atheist chaplain.
I am not allowed to 'Go to Bragg boulevard and shake daddies little money maker for twenties stuffed into my undies'.
I am not authorized to fire officers.
I am not a citizen of Texas, and those other, forty-nine, lesser states.
I may not use public masturbation as a tool to demonstrate a flaw in a command decision.
Not allowed to trade military equipment for 'magic beans'.
Not allowed to sell magic beans during duty hours.
Not allowed to quote 'Dr Seuss' on military operations.
Not allowed to yell 'Take that Cobra' at the rifle range.
Not allowed to quote 'Full Metal Jacket ' at the rifle range.
'Napalm sticks to kids' is *not* a motivational phrase.
An order to 'Put Kiwi on my boots' does *not* involve fruit.
An order to 'Make my Boots black and shiny' does not involve electrical tape.
The proper response to a lawful order is not 'Why?'
The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.
May not make posters depicting the leadership failings of my chain of command.
‘The Giant Space Ants' are not at the top of my chain of command.
If one soldier has a 2nd Lt bar on his uniform, and I have an E-4 on mine It means he outranks me. It does not mean ‘I have been promoted three more times than you'.
It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission, no longer applies to Specialist Schwarz.
Command decisions do *not* need to be ratified by a 2/3 majority.
Inflatable novelties do *not* entitle me to BAQ or Separation pay.
There are no evil clowns living under my bed.
There is no ‘Anti-Mime' campaign in Bosnia.
I am not the Psychological Warfare Mascot.
I may not line my helmet with tin foil to ‘Block out the space mind control lasers'.
May not pretend to be a facist stormtrooper, while on duty.
I am not authorized to prescribe any form of medication.
I must not flaunt my deviances in front of my chain of command.
May not wear gimp mask while on duty.
No military functions are to be performed ‘Skyclad'.
Woad is not camouflage makeup.
May not conduct psychological experiments on my chain of command.
"Teddy Bear, Teddy bear, turn around" is *not* a cadence.
The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."
I may not call block my chain of command.
I am neither the king nor queen of cheese.
Not allowed to wear a dress to any army functions.
May not bring a drag queen to the battalion formal dance.
May not form any press gangs.
Must not start any SITREP (Situation Report) with "I recently had an experience I just had to write you about...."
Must not use military vehicles to ‘Squish' things.
Not allowed to make any Psychological Warfare products depicting the infamous Ft. Bragg sniper incident.
May not challenge anyone in my chain of command to the ‘field of honor'.
If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
Must not refer to 1st Sgt as ‘Mom'.
Must not refer to the Commander as ‘Dad'.
Inflatable sheep do *not* need to be displayed during a room inspection.
I am not authorized to initiate Jihad.
When asked to give a few words at a military ceremony ‘Romper Bomper Stomper Boo' is probably not appropriate.
Nerve gas is not funny.
Crucifixes do not ward off officers, and I should not test that.
I am not in need of a more suitable host body.
‘Redneck Zombies' is not a military training aid.
Gozer does not dwell in my refrigerator.
The proper response to a chemical weapon attack is not ‘Tell my chain of command what I really think about them, and then poke holes in their masks.'
A smiley face is not used to mark a minefield.
Claymore mines are not filled with yummy candy, and it is wrong to tell new soldiers that they are.
I am not allowed to mount a bayonet on a crew-served weapon.
Rodents are not entitled to burial with full military honors, even if they are "casualties of war".
My commander is not old enough to have fought in the civil war, and I should stop implying that he did.
Vodka, green food coloring, and a ‘Cool Mint’ Listerine® bottle is not a good combination.
I am not allowed to bum cigarettes off of anyone under twelve.
I may not trade my rifle for any of the following: Cigarettes, booze, sexual favors, Kalishnikovs, Soviet Armored vehicles, small children, or bootleg CD’s.
Must not mock command decisions in front of the press.
Should not taunt members of the press, even if they are really fat, exceptionally stupid, and working for UPI.
I am not authorized to change national policy in Eastern Europe.
Never, ever, attempt to correct a Green Beret officer about anything.
I am not qualified to operate any US, German, Polish, or Russian Armored vehicles.
When saluting a ‘leg’ officer, an appropriate greeting is not "Airborne leads the wa- oh...sorry sir".
There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from ‘Full Monty’ every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff".
I cannot trade my CO to the Russians.
I should not speculate on the penis size of anyone who outranks me.
Crucifying mice - bad idea.
Must not use government equipment to bootleg pornography.
Burn pits for classified material are not revel fires - therefore it is wrong to dance naked around them.
I cannot arrest children for being rude.
An EO briefing is probably not the best place to unveil my newest off color joke.
I should not use government resources to ‘waterproof’ dirty magazines.
Radioactive material should not be stored in the barracks.
I should not teach other soldiers to say offensive and crude things in Albanian, under the guise of teaching them how to say potentially useful phrases.
Two drink limit does not mean first and last.
Two drink limit does not mean two kinds of drinks.
Two drink limit does not mean the drinks can be as large as I like.
‘No Drinking Of Alcoholic Beverages’ does not imply that a Jack Daniel’s ® IV is acceptable.
"Shpadoinkle" is not a real word.
The Microsoft ® ‘Dancing Paperclip’ is not authorized to countermand any orders.
‘I’m drunk’ is a bad answer to any question posed by my commander.
No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.
The loudspeaker system is not a forum to voice my ideas.
The loudspeaker system is not to be used to replace the radio.
The loudspeaker system is not to be used to broadcast the soundtrack to a porno movie.
An order to put polish on my boots means the whole boot.
Shouting ‘Let’s do the village! Let’s do the whole fucking village!’ while out on a mission is bad.
Should not show up at the front gate wearing part of a Russian uniform, messily drunk.
Even if my commander did it.
Must not teach interpreters how to make "MRE" bombs.
I am not authorized to sell mineral rights.
Not allowed to use a broadsword to disprove ‘The Pen is Mightier than the sword’.
'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
I do not need to keep a 'range card' by my window.
'K-Pot, LBE, and a thin coat of Break-free' is not an authorized uniform.
I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.
Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
I should not threaten suicide with pop rocks and Coke ®.
Putting red 'Mike and Ike's' ® into a prescription medicine bottle, and then eating them all in a formation is not funny.
Must not create new DOD forms, then insist they be filled out.
On Sports Day PT, a wedgie is not considered a legal tackle.
The proper way to report to my Commander is 'Specialist Schwarz, reporting as ordered, Sir' not 'You can't prove a thing!'
The following items do not exist: Keys to the Drop Zone, A box of grid squares, blinker fluid, winter air for tires, canopy lights, or Chem-Light ® batteries.
I should not assign new privates to 'guard the flight line'.
Shouldn't treat 'piss-bottles' with extra-strength icy hot.
Teaching Albanian children to taunt other soldiers is not nice.
I will no longer perform 'lap-dances' while in uniform.
If I take the uniform off, in the course of the lap-dance, it still counts.
The revolution is not now.
When detained by MP's, I do not have a right to a strip search.
No part of the military uniform is edible.
Bodychecking General officers is not a good idea.
Past lives have absolutely no effect on the chain of command.
Take that hat off.
There is no such thing as a were-virgin.
I do not get 'that time of month'.
No, the pants are not optional.
Not allowed to operate a business out of the barracks.
Especially not a pornographic movie studio.
Not even if they *are* 'especially patriotic films'
Not allowed to 'defect' to OPFOR during training missions.
On training missions, try not to shoot down the General's helicopter.
'A full magazine and some privacy' is not the way to help a potential suicide.
I am not allowed to create new levels of security clearance.
Furby ® is not allowed into classified areas. (I swear to the gods, I did not make that up, it's actually DOD policy).
We do not 'charge into battle, naked, like the Celts'.
Any device that can crawl across the table on medium, does not need to be brought into the office.
I am not to refer to a formation as 'the boxy rectangle thingie'.
I am not 'A lesbian trapped in a man's body'.
On Army documents, my race is not 'Other'.
Nor is it 'Secretariat, in the third'.
Pokémon® trainer is not an MOS.
There is no FM for 'wall-to-wall counseling'.
My chain of command has neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Fruit Roll-Ups. ®
When operating a military vehicle I may *not* attempt something 'I saw in a cartoon'.
My name is not a killing word.
I am not the Emperor of anything.
Must not taunt officers in the throes of nicotine withdrawal, with cigarettes.
May not challenge officers to 'Meet me on the field of honor, at dawn'.
Do not dare SERE graduates to eat bugs. They will always do it.
Must not make s'mores while on guard duty.
Our Humvees cannot be assembled into a giant battle-robot.
The proper response to a briefing is not 'That's what you think'.
The Masons, and Gray Aliens are not in our chain of command.
Shouldn't take incriminating photos of my chain of command.
Shouldn't use Photoshop ® to create incriminating photos of my chain of command.
I am not allowed to give tattoos.
I am not allowed to sing 'Henry the VIII I am' until verse 68 ever again.
Not allowed to lead a 'Coup' during training missions.
I should not confess to crimes that took place before I was born.
My chain of command is not interested in why I 'just happen' to have a kilt, an inflatable sheep, and a box of rubber bands in the back of my car.
Must not valiantly push officers onto hand grenades to save the squad.
Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined.
'To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is a bad long term goal to give the re-enlistment NCO.
NEVER nail a stuffed bunny to a cross and put it up in front of the Battalion Headquarters sign as an "Easter Desecration."
Don't write up false gigs on a HMMWV PMCS. ("Broken clutch pedal", "Number three turbine has frequent flame-outs", "flux capacitor emits loud whine when engaged")
Not allowed to get shot.
The Chicken and Rice MRE is *not* a personal lubricant. (Skippy wanted this noted for the record that this is not something he has ever attempted or considered! It was something we heard at dinner on 22 September 2001 and it was just so obscene it had to go here.)
Not allowed to play into the deluded fantasies of the civlians who are "hearing conversations" from the NSA, FBI, CIA and KGB due to the microchip the aliens implanted in their brain.
An airsickness bag is to be used for airsickness *only*. (Also not a Skippy-ism...this was the same dinner.)
Must not make T-shirts up depciting a pig with the writing "Eat Pork or Die" in Arabic to bring as civilian attire when preparing to deploy to a primarily Muslim country.
Don't ask LTC Steele to sign my copy of Blackhawk Down.
Must not go on nine deployments in six years that require a security clearance that I don't have, even if the Army tells me repeatedly that I have one and I have no reason to question them.
Do not convince NCO's that their razorbumps are the result of microscopic parasites.

yeah thats funny, I have read it before. But the only thing thats no longer true about that is that there ARE chem lite batterys. I had a soldier look for them when he was new to the unit. Unfortantly he was a raver like myself, so he went and got a few packets of the mini, mouth chem lites. They are called chemlite batteries. That was kinda imbarrising.

I still have people go look for a BA-1100-NS form or to get me the PU-55Y form. I had a soldier right it down and still didnt get it. He then walked all over the unit looking for them. He even asked our E.O. Sgt if she had a PU-55Y. Yeah that got me in some trouble. lol.

Army Dogs are very undisciplined... unlike my USMC brethern...

llz what happened to your picture's quality... suddenly looks like someone spat on it then rubbed it with sandpaper

I WANT THIS CAR!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.canadatrader.com/trader/result/affich.asp?rubno=4000&r=%27BRC%27&ste=&sid=&issr=1&yfr=0&yto=0&kfr=0&kto=0&pfr=0&pto=0&dm=1&dp=4&mk=NISSAN&md=300+ZX&kw=&or=0&oby=7&pg=1&vid=2663154

Nice Shiro! #22? Wow...!

you know what makes me soo happy about my car, it is that my oil lever never changes in between oil changes. it stays at the same level for 3k miles. hell yeah.

-Jared

What's green and smells like pork?

Green pork?

Dude this thread fucking rocks... ZGringo... Or anyone else, if you want to be in the ZedEx Crew... Just PM me, and I'll have a 'sit-down' with the rest of the crew.

Yesterday at practice I saw a kid crap his pants...

Since we're being random :D

-Wes

Delerious... Love the new name dude :thumbsup:

*Someone yells from back of room "RANDOM PICTURES!"*

Meh... Ok

http://img89.exs.cx/img89/8268/ChillinYoAgain.jpg

What do ya' know... Wes Banks fucking off again? Noooo... Couldnt be :D

http://img83.exs.cx/img83/2163/ChillinYo.jpg

High School rocks man... The whole worlds out to get me, I swear to God.

-Wes

art class eh?

Haha, you say that like you know something I dont :lol:

-Wes

who's the goofy looking guy behind you? and where have you been?

Haha, thats the Senior Class Jerk-Off... Doesnt take shit serious... Fun dude to be around though.

I had a bad night last night... So I didnt get on at all... Damn girls.

A senior in high school, and chics still act like they're in the 6th grade... Pfff, whatever.

-Wes

shit son you're still in high school? how old are you?

17... 18 on Halloween.

Nothing wrong with High School... And Im enjoying this last year of 'Not in the real worldness'.

Graduating is gonna suck ass dude...

-Wes

i agree, other than university/college, high school will probably be most people's best years... i miss high school and seeing everyone in it... altho, i don't miss the big soap opera shit put on by all the chicks.. that was such a joke...

i still have a year and a half of high school left. i agree with you wes, i can't stand how the girls still act, it annoys me all to living hell.

-Jared

yeah...back when i was your guys ages i had to walk 25 miles in the snow with no shoes on to school. i had iscicles hanging from my testicles by the time i made it there. those were the good ole days. lol. :D

sorry i had to say that. graduated last year. i hated my high school though. everything was drama. oh well.

i graduated 2 years ago, and i'm 18... how does that work?

i dont know how you did it 2 years ago. that would mean you started kindergarten when you were 4. lol. im 18 and i graduated last year becuase i have a late birthday. you must have got bumped a year.

heh, my dad always says that he had to walk 2 miles in the snow uphill both ways.

RANDOM PICTURE
http://img62.exs.cx/img62/2820/z23.jpg

-Jared

kinda gots that whole fish thing going on again. lol

looks like catfish.

Man I graduated from High School almost 10 years ago, in 1996........ Best thing about high school, it was never so easy to get a girl in "bed"..... downside of high school, it was never so easy to get envolved in teenibopper drama.

Actualy I miss college more than HS. Thats where I did the most damage to the world. Now that I am 27 its harder to get girls that dont have kids, no offence. But I am illprepaired for a easy bake family. No "cling-ons" for me for at least 3 more years then maybe, and thats a BIG maybe. But I aint getting rid of the car. My dream is to marry a woman with a 2+2 Z32 that knows how to work on her car and is half way decent looking, not real picky. Oh and she has to be LOW maintaince. I always hated "preps" and "barbie" girls. I like my women like my cars, slightly over weight, fast, tough and mean, but they still look good. :)

mmeeeoooww... i think the car looks like a catfish too..

well i gradded when i was 17, then last year gradded from bcit when i was 18.. and i'm still 18.. late birthday i guess

FLYING LAWN MOWER!!!!!
http://www.flyingthingz.com/videos/skycutter40.wmv (http://www.flyingthingz.com/videos/skycutter40.wmv)

-Jared

that is the craziest thing i have ever seen. flying lawn mowers...what will they think of next?

What's green and smells like pork?

Green Pork? No, you rejects!

KERMIT THE FROGS MIDDLE FINGER...

is there a muppet babies marathon on that im missing??? lol

Were you guys even old enough for the Muppet Babies... let alone the Muppets?

i watched the muppet babies growing up. i dont quite remember the original.

... yeah... so Kermit's finger.... smells like pork... ha... ha....

I watched the Muppet Show when I was a kid..... Didnt get some of the jokes then, but now I get all of them, and some of them where pretty bad.

......

ok i'll bite... HAHAHAHA nice one 1via

LoL... thanks! You're great Delerious!

haha not a prob... i wonder what the limit of posts is for a thread?

Good question...

Like I said... This is the best thread ever :D

Yea girls are fucking odd guys... But I just lost one that I had so much respect for, it wasnt even funny.

She was cool as hell, TKD Champ, heading to the Olympics in a few years for TKD, Cross Country Champ, Track Champ... And shes beautiful. Perfect chic in my opinion... I dont know many chics that will go running with you at 4:30 in the morning, on the beach for that matter.

But she had one aspect of her that was immature... And that turned out to be the end of the relationship there. Kinda tore me up.

Im picky as fuck when it comes to girls, so when I find one... I like them quite a bit. So I set myself up sometimes... But o well, a few more months and I'll be surrounded by drunk ass sluts doing lines off each others ass's :rolleyes: Yea real attractive eh?

-Wes

fuckem and chuckem... only way to go

LoL... you guys are lame!

LOL OWNED :owned:

http://web1.servforce.com/%7Ecj8/index.html

LoL... that sucks...! How much are those gay H2's? what a waste!

Haha, dude it is so weird that just got brough up... That chic that I was dating, her dad drove an H2, and he got stuck on a high curb :D :lol:

-Wes